Poofs and Lezzers

August 3, 2006

A quick word about this important social issue, which obviously must be dealt with sensitively and intelligently.

In X-Men 2: Fievel Goes West, the mum says to her kid, who is a mutant, “Have you tried not being a mutant?” This is a terribly clever and original use of subtext by director Bryan Singer, because it’s like mutants are sort of like gays, and Bryan is “one of them”, if you can follow my clever and original subtext.

But it wasn’t remotely original because as any fule kno, Joyce says exactly the same thing to Buffy in Season 2’s Becoming (Part 2).

Buffy has been metaphorically gay for ages, because Joss Wedon himself is metaphorically gay. He’s married to a lady, and all that, but you know that see-through plastic girl’s backpack that Dawn has in Once More With Feeling? That belonged to Joss. And in any case, that was musical theatre. We all know what that is Hollywood secret code for, don’t we? Fancying boys.

Forget Willow and Tara moving that coke machine using only the power of their tits. For the most lesbific storyline ever, I’d go for Season Three.

Never mind how in Revelations Buffy teases her friends by talking about how she’s seeing someone and turns out to be Faith. It all goes completely gay in Bad Girls, which starts with Buffy and Faith having a flirty chat about how are both “Slayers” – not like anyone else – and they “get off” on slaying. Buffy is coy about this, but Faith accuses her of playing Miss Goody Two Shoes. Faith is basically saying, “You love it really, don’t you, you dirty cow.” Then you’ve got the bit where they do a bit of slaying together and then go for a boogie together at the bronze. They’re surrounded by men but those men don’t stand flippin’ chance with them.

And you’ve got the bit where Faith huffs on the window and draws a heart in it – because she and Buffy are in love! Ah, no, then she draws a stake through it. She’s just inviting Buffy to go slaying with her. But that’s just another word for fiddling with each other’s parts until they go off, clearly.


3 Responses to “Poofs and Lezzers”

  1. Kristine Says:

    Hello! It’s been a while since you’ve updated, however I wanted to let you know that I’ve added you as an author to the WordPress Buffy community using your email address (peter.object@gmail.com) at btvs.wordpress.com and would be grateful if you would contribute some of your essays over there. Thanks!

  2. Joe Says:

    I’m just letting you know that I’m a random passer by who has just been converted to avid reader.

    – Joe

  3. I am a French Algerian woman and I had been living for over 20 years in France, I learned english while I was in UK for 2 years.nI read you arti Click https://twitter.com/moooker1

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: